“The Roots of Buddhism” Series: Teachings on Friendship

Our “Roots of Buddhism” is our new series at Greatwoods Zen in which every two months, we will dive into the deeper and more nuanced teachings of Buddhism. These are not merely intellectual or philosophical explorations; rather, we will inquire and discover how these teachings apply to the most important questions and meaning of our every day lives and practice.
As a complement to the joyous and social nature of our community, these days of mindfulness will be practiced in noble silence, where we will have an opportunity to touch the deeper threads of our practice individually and collectively. Have you ever tried a whole day in silence in community? It is a real treat, a retreat!
Our theme this month will be on the Buddha’s teachings on the practice and power of spiritual friendship. For those who with any allergic reactions to the word “spiritual”, don’t worry - another, perhaps translation is simply “good friendship” or “admirable friendship”. In Sanskrit this is known as kalyāṇa-mitra; kalyāṇa means lovely, noble, or virtuous and mitra (having the same the root word as maitri or “lovingkindness”) means friend.
The Buddha taught over and over again, the utter importance of kalyāṇa-mitra, a relationship where both people support one another in abandoning what is unskillful and developing what is skillful, providing the backbone of support for deepening our insights, peace, and happiness. In poetic style, the Buddha shared, “Just as the dawn is the forerunner of the sunrise, so kalyāṇa-mitra is the forerunner for the arising of the noble eightfold path.”
A kalyāṇa-mitra is not a fixed state of being, or a quality that you’re born into forever. Rather, it is a practice that needs cultivation, refinement, continued efforts, sustenance, and enjoyment. What is the quality of your friendship to those around you? Do you feel content and pleased with the depth of lovingkindness and ethical uprightness that you are offering each day? Take a moment to sit with this precious question.
And what are the areas you can grow? As a support for our practice, the Buddha taught how to strengthen our capacities as a friend. In a less well known yet inspiring teaching, the Buddha shared, “The Four Kinds of Good Friends” that we will explore as our first teaching in our Roots of Buddhism series. I find it to be a fun, challenging, and rewarding sutra to explore, both individually, but especially as a community of friends. I hope to see you there.
Please bring: lunch for yourself, and a little something to share with others (if you want).
Please register in advance.