Women's Community Grief Ritual

Grief pulls us into our sacred darkness, the heart of our Essence. In this place we remember who we are, connect to what matters most, and come home to ourselves. Releasing old ways of being, we rebirth ourselves anew, again and again. Having fully surrendered to grief, we return with greater levels of resource, clarity, and power.

We have lost our way in remembering grief’s medicine in these times of patriarchy and capitalism. Many of us lack a literacy of grief. We often fail to recognize how unprocessed grief inhibits our aliveness, purpose, love and joy. We dare not enter that terrible well without support, afraid we won’t find our way back. Yet there are ways to work with grief.

Grief has many faces and expressions, including loss, death, transition, unmet needs, unfulfilled dreams, illness, change, failure, betrayal, ancestral traumas, environmental change, social injustice, rupture and violence in our personal relationships, communities, and world. Many griefs are universal, and yet there are particular griefs we as women hold that must be tended. There is much to grieve as women such as the impacts of:

• cultural and familial conditioning - people pleasing, suppressing anger,...
• sisterhood wounds - competition, loneliness, betrayal,...
• womb wounds - abortion, child loss, infertility, birth trauma, hormonal conditions,...
• sexual violations
• body image wounds - dysmorphia, eating disorders, fat/skinny shaming, ...
• motherhood wounds - isolation, loss of identity, lack of support,...
• patriarchy wounds - misogyny, power over dynamics, undervaluing women’s work, cultural gaslighting, loss of reverence for aging and wise women,...
• matriarchal ancestral traumas
• disconnection with the Earth/Mother/feminine

As we enter the well of sorrows within we are called forth to awaken the ancient map of feminine descent-and-return that remains intact in our psyche, being, and the natural world. There is no other way but through, and we cannot do this alone. All grief, no matter how big or small, how old or new, can be met with kindness, presence and the resource needed for its tending and transformation. Our grief holds the keys for right action, relationship, and renewal. If we do not honor and contact our grief together we do not receive the hidden wisdom, power and love waiting as the essential medicine for these times.

When we come together as women in the fertile darkness of our grief we create a sacred container to contact the deep feminine wisdom within. We gain access to the wild and wise ways of the Great Mother, All That Is. In that reconnection and reclamation we create the neural pathways of belonging, fierce compassion, and shared power in service to the whole.

We once again remember to tend to our sacred grief, to honor our beloved dead and all the precious lives to come. We offer up our tender hearts, our righteous anger, and our cries of love for the healing of our souls, the regeneration of our lands, and the restoration of harmony on Earth.

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In this ritual, we will

-Co-create a safe and sacred space in community to honor individual and collective grief.

-Connect to and explore the wombspace to contact what griefs we have stored there

-Learn about different types of grief and ways to honorably tend to it.

-Expand perspectives on how grief is held in wisdom traditions, mythic and indigenous ways.

-Open to the womb and express grief through writing, movement, song, toning, and connection with nature.

-Experience the healing power of honoring grief by being witnessed and witnessing others grieving without trying to change, fix or solve the grief process.

-Open your heart and increase vitality through the liberating energy of compassion and forgiveness.

-Cultivate a renewed intimacy with yourself and recover the aliveness that is awakened from choosing to honor and embrace grief in your daily life.

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This ritual is for women and womb bearers who have been enculturated as women. We hold with great care that being a 'woman' goes far beyond our current societal definition and relationship to femininity.

Because we are cis-hetero female leaders, we are lacking the depth of knowledge and skill required to hold a more inclusive space of safety for all those who identify as women at this time. We intend to hold a grief ritual for all peoples in the later spring/early summer.

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We hold tenderly in our hearts that each being has their own relationship with prosperity and the flow of money.

Honoring this diversity, we offer a sliding scale, as well as a benefaction/reparation program specifically for BIPOC and LGBTQIA+, and individuals who identify financial need.

The scale is intended to be a map, inviting each of us to take inventory of our financial resources and look deeper at our levels of privilege. It is a way to challenge the classist and capitalist society we live in and work towards economic justice on a local level. Please look within your heart and pay what is in alignment with your level of abundance.

10% of the proceeds for this event will be donated to the Dagara Empowerment Water project & the Amah Mutsen Tribal Band. The Dagara Empowerment Water Project is empowering the Dagara community with sustainable drinking water and support. The wells are being built in Malidoma & Sobonfu Some's family compound and community. This project was built as a way to give back to the Dagara people for their profound grief wisdom and healing ways that inspired this ritual remembrance. See more details here: https://support.thesonderproject.org/fundraiser/4625276.

The Humunya Foundation of Amah Mutsen Tribal Band, is a non-profit in service to raising funds to restore traditional stewardship practices, protect sacred sites, regain tribal land and conduct outreach to the public. See more details here: https://amahmutsun.org/

Sliding Scale Guide: Find your right amount within the $333-$777 range, or see below

$777- SUPPORT - If you comfortably meet basic needs and have ample income, your payment in this $556-$777 range helps to support the work and assists those who cannot pay the full amount.

$555- SUSTAIN - If you are able to meet basic needs and have expendable income, your payment $334-$555 in this range allows us to meet the operating costs and supports the facilitators so they can continue to offer this work.

$333- RECEIVE / REPARATIONS - If you are struggling to meet basic needs and have no expendable income, your payment allows you to be supported by receiving a discount off the full cost. This is reserved for those in financial need and those that would benefit from reparations.

Partial Scholarship available by application for those in severe financial need. Scholarships will be awarded by March 10th. Apply Here

REFUNDS: We are unable to offer refunds but you can transfer your attendance to a future ritual or your registration fee can be donated to someone in need, to be used within 1 year.

All are welcome regardless of race, religion, gender, sexual orientation, ethnicity.

Registration closes Tuesday, March 10th at midnight to give us time and space to prepare for the ritual. Space is Limited! REGISTER SOON!

FACILITATION: Mikyö Black-Wangmo will not be co-facilitating this ritual, as she stays home and tends to her new furry family member, Luna, in New Mexico. Sirena Andrea, Jane Hansen and many other highly skilled and experienced assistants will be supporting.

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Friday, March 13th, 5:00pm- 9:00pm

Saturday, March 14th, 9:00 am - 6:00 pm

Sunday, March 15th, 9:00 am - 6:00 pm*

*Optional & highly encouraged beach fire circle, Sun. 6:30-7pm-ish, Seabright Beach, Santa Cruz, Ca.

Before Ritual Preparation Circle (virtual): Tuesday, March 3rd, 6:30-8pm

After Ritual Integration Circle (virtual): Tuesday, April 7th, 6:30-8/8:30pm

Held at Highlands Park Senior Center in Ben Lomond, Ca.

Tea and light snacks will be provided. Bring your own lunch for Saturday and Sunday. A refrigerator will be available.

Register by using the Eventbrite payment system, or by sending payment via Venmo @Dana-Schlick with an email to [email protected].

If you have any questions, contact us by email at [email protected], or by text/phone: Dana Schlick at (831)-515-8262.

You can also see our website: www.BrokenOpen.love

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Host or Publisher Dana Elaine Schlick & Mikyö Black- Wangmo