2025 Douglas County Highland Games - Heavy Athletics

EVENT INFORMATION - HEAVY ATHLETICS ENTRIES: UNLEASH YOUR INNER BEAST!

Location: Get your sweaty, kilted arse to Melrose Vineyards, just 15 minutes west of Roseburg, Oregon, where the ground trembles and the vines weep in awe. Mark your calendars for Saturday and Sunday, August 23rd & 24th, 2025—two days of pure, unadulterated Highland havoc!

Check-In & Start: Roll up around 8:30ish to the Heavy Events Field—don’t be late, or we’ll assume you’re still crying over your last caber flop. Competition kicks off at 9:00ish, so limber up those tree-trunk thighs and prepare to dominate. For a measly $33, you get entry to the games, a badass T-shirt to flex in, lunch, and high-fives so hard your palm’ll sting ‘til next year. Paying with checks or money orders? Make 'em out to the Douglas County Celtic Society (DCCS), or we’ll send a bagpiper to haunt your dreams.

Deadline: Get your entry in by July 31st, or you’ll miss out on the T-shirt, free camping, and those sweet, sweet high-fives. Latecomers? You’ll get a shirt if we’ve got spares—don’t count on it, ye procrastinating numpties. Pre-registered warriors only get the guaranteed swag. Oh, and we’ll toss in water and lunch so you don’t keel over mid-toss.

Saturday Lineup: Men’s Lightweights (for the wiry wee lads under 200 lbs), Men’s Masters (grizzled vets 40-49 and 50+), and the Women’s classes—because the lasses can hurl a caber farther than your ego can stretch.

Sunday Lineup: Men’s A (the top-tier titans), Men’s B (mid-level madmen), Men’s C/Novice (fresh meat learning to yeet). Free camping Friday and Saturday nights—pitch your tent, crack a brew, and howl at the moon.

Got Questions? Bug Athletic Director Tyler Pope at [email protected]—he’s the kilted kingpin of this chaos.

CLASSES:

- Men’s A: Elite amateur gods who toss like they’re auditioning for Valhalla.

- Men’s B: Solid intermediates who’ve got grit but haven’t peaked yet.

- Men’s C/Novice: Newbies with dreams bigger than their biceps—no sandbagging, ya cheats!

- Men’s Lightweight: Under 200 lbs of wiry fury.

- Men’s Masters: 40-49 and 50+ legends proving age is just a number and a sore back.

- Women’s A+B (or Open): Fierce queens of the field, all skill levels welcome.

- Women’s Masters: 40+ goddesses who’d snap you like a twig.

- Women’s Lightweight: Under 150 lbs of pure, pint-sized power.

Too few throwers? We’ll mash classes together like a haggis smoothie—deal with it.

EVENTS:

- Stone Throw (Braemar & Open): Chuck rocks like you’re stoning a dragon.

- Weight for Distance (Heavy & Light): A steel ball of pure, unadulterated menace, chained to a handle that screams, “I dare you to throw me, you weak-kneed coward!”

- Hammer Toss (Heavy & Light): Swing it like you’re banishing demons to the abyss.

- Weight over Bar: Hurl it skyward—spinning’s fine if the judge isn’t a buzzkill.

- Sheaf: Stab a hay sack with a pitchfork and fling it over a bar, because normal sports are for wimps.

- Caber: Flip a giant log and pray it doesn’t crush your dreams (or your skull).

• RULES:

We’re running this madness by SHA rules—check ‘em at www.scottishheavyathletics.com/rules.html. Kilts, hose, and athlete shirts are mandatory—novices get a pass if they haven’t snagged a kilt yet (grow a pair and get one). Any kilt style works. The Athletic Director can tweak, merge, or axe classes and events if he damn well pleases. Best competition marks decide your class, so no fibbing, ya glory hogs. Judges and the AD’s word is law—argue, and they’ll bury you in a peat bog. Now, quit yer bletherin’ and sign up, ye glorious lunatics!

Host or Publisher Tyler Pope