The Grief Collective

The Grief Collective

Initially inspired by my own experience of anticipatory grief following my wonderful granny’s terminal pancreatic cancer diagnosis, I wanted to provide a comfortable and inviting space for those going also going through grief, whether it's anticipatory, recent or historical.

As the owner of Hordeum Botanical Studio | Disposition Coffee, the hot drinks are on me as I welcome you into my store after hours. We’ll gather round my communal table, share stories of our loved ones (if we’re feeling up to it) and talk through the highs and lows we may be feeling, the random triggers that have hit us hard this week. We'll listen, support and learn from each other as we navigate one of life's most challenging journeys.

Our first meeting will be Thursday 13th January. Due to the sensitive nature of grief, the group will have a maximum of 10 people. The event is free but ticketed to keep track of numbers. If there is demand, I’ll add an additional date for the first meeting.

Thanks so much for your support,

Natalie x

My grief story:

Back in August, my granny (82 but the mental age of 21, an icon ❤️) was sadly diagnosed with terminal pancreatic cancer and in October her doctors told her she was into her final few weeks.

She’s the most resilient woman I know and is taking it all in her stride. She made it to Christmas -can’t eat much but enjoyed a mini “fine dining” version of Christmas dinner (half a brussel sprout and a quenelle of mash!) then New Year’s - brought in the bells with a Shloer in hand! She is currently still with us and taking each day as it comes, still cracking jokes and bragging about her “recent weight loss”

She made it to my wedding in September, we’ve talked through hundreds of memories & photos together as a family. Although she lives back home in Northern Ireland, I’ve been able to fly over to visit every other week, we’ve had more time than we thought we would when she was diagnosed and have said everything we could ever want to say..

However, I’ve come to realise that however beautiful or “lucky” the end of life journey has been, the grief is still all-consuming at times, and so complex. I bounce between feeling endlessly grateful for the time we have together, feeling cheated that she’s leaving us too soon, feeling guilty for not just appreciating the time we have, feeling drained from thinking all of the above. And that’s while she’s still with us!

What I found to have helped me so far is talking about the things that suddenly trigger grief, no matter how random they seem (watching her open some post and thinking how can she be here reading a letter and soon she won’t?) Grief works in mysterious ways and I think sharing with others is a really powerful way of understanding and processing it, particularly with others who are experiencing it.

Host or Publisher Disposition Coffee