Thanksgiving Cuddle Puddle

Thanksgiving Platonic Cuddle Puddle

Join me for a cozy, respectful gathering to explore boundaries, practice consent, and experience the beauty of platonic connection.

This in-person event provides a safe and supportive space to connect, cuddle, and deepen your understanding of respecting comfort levels. Whether you’re new to cuddling or a seasoned pro, everyone is welcome!

Come relax, learn, and bask in the warmth of human connection in a judgment-free environment filled with good vibes.

Details:

• 📍 Location: Kailua (announced the day before)
• 🚗 Parking: Street parking available; bikes/mopeds can park in the yard
• 🍎 Snacks: Fruits and light snacks provided. Feel free to bring healthy, vegan treats to share!

This event is inspired by a beautiful Community I'm part of overseas, called the Mush Community.

More about the container and agreements:

To create a safe container for this exploration, it's only possible to join the event if you agree to honor the Agreements listed below. The Mush Agreements are inspired by the Mush Values:

1.) Safety

2.) Love

3.) Authenticity

4.) Autonomy

The agreements support us to practice the values and create a touch-positive space where everyone feels safe to give and receive platonic love, be fully self-expressed, and explore new ways of relating with each other. You don’t need to remember it all! Just take in the big picture, and we will review and practice all of this during the facilitation.

Agreements:

1.) Love Each Other

A.) Intend to share (send and receive) love with everybody in the space, whether you know them or not. You don’t need to touch everyone; you can share love at a distance.

B.) Keep it Non-Sexual (Platonic Container = Not Erotic, No Neo-Tantra Vibes). It’s Puppy-Dog Kitty-Cat love, like you would share with a baby or your grandma.

C.) If you get sexually activated, keep that energy to yourself and take actions to decrease the sexual activation.

D.) Don’t talk about sex or sex-positive events.

2.) Regulate Your Nervous System and Support the Group Co-Regulation (we’ll teach you how).

A.) If you notice that you are activated, take action to regulate your nervous system.

B.) If you notice that another person is trying to regulate, join them in a co-regulation.

C.) Avoid activities or topics of conversation that are activating for you or for others.

3.) Take Care of Yourself and Each Other

A.) Care about others’ preferences and boundaries, and trust that we care about yours.

B.) Make sure you are comfy, and if not, do something about it.

C.) Move slowly and listen for the other’s response.

D.) Give a clear response (preferably non-verbal) when you are touched.

E.) Say No or redirect any touch that doesn’t feel good to you.

F.) Say “Thank You” when others express their boundaries or redirect your touch.

G.) Watch out for Freeze and Fawn responses; if you’re not sure then stop touching them.

H.) Ask for help from a facilitator if you need it, or if you think someone else needs it.

I.) Seek to include others in the Mushchitecture; be willing to change positions to make space for more Mushers.

J.) Ask for and offer physical support when climbing through and around the pile of humans. Be interactive.

4.) Take Care of the Space

A.) No photos or electronics in the Mush space; leave your phone and smartwatch outside.

B.) Stay sober; do not consume mind-altering substances or alcohol before or during the event.

C.) Keep the indoor space as non-verbal as possible. Use words only as needed.

D.) Practice hygiene; shower before the mush, clean your feet.

E.) Get checked for head lice before coming inside, and don’t come when you’re sick.

F.) Don’t lean against windows or fridge.

G.) Save Water; flush responsibly.

5.) Be Curious & Present; No Expectations

A.) Come to Space with open-mind and curiosity about what will happen.

B.) Stay in the Present moment; sense what is happening inside your body and in the space. If your thoughts are in the past or future, then co-regulate.

C.) After the event, if you meet participants outside the Mush Container, don’t expect to continue the same level of intimacy that you experienced at the Mush.

6.) Peacefully Resolve Conflicts

A.) If you feel triggered by another person’s actions, or you feel that your boundaries were crossed, take prompt action to address this. Co-regulate first, and then either address your concerns directly with the person, or seek help from a Facilitator.

B.) If someone else wants to resolve a conflict with you, be willing to speak about what happened with them (and possibly with Mediation from a facilitator).

C.) Seek to empathize with the other person’s experience.

D.) Celebrate truthfulness and vulnerability

E.) Be open to feedback about how your actions are affecting others and make meaningful efforts to reduce harm and improve adherence to the agreements.

7.) Keep the Container

A.) Everyone is an angel in the space; support the other participants to honor the agreements by speaking up when you see something is out of alignment. Thank others when they do this.

B.) After the event, Keep these container agreements and keep it platonic until you have had a chance to sleep, wake up, and have a few minutes by yourself to consider the best course of action.

8.) Celebrate Playfulness

A.) Celebrate the playfulness you see in others, even if you don’t feel like being playful yourself.

B.) If you hear the voice of your playful inner child, give them control of the body for a few minutes.

C.) Enjoy acting like a puppy or kitten or whatever makes you feel good. Miau Miau 😺

Host or Publisher Suyanne Mello