Blackwater Holylight/SOM/rebreather

When the women of Blackwater Holylight left their hometown of Portland OR three

years ago, their mission was to escape the gloom of the Pacific Northwest and the

placating comfort of familiarity. Aiming for the sunnier climes of LA, the band found

themselves not only in a warmer environment, but in a blank slate landscape—one

without jobs, longtime friend groups, and the easy retreat of old habits. And it was here,

unencumbered by the contentment of security, that Blackwater Holylight began diligently

working on their fourth full-length album, Not Here Not Gone.

As with their previous work, Not Here Not Gone explores the duality of light and dark—

menacing riffs provide the bedrock to beguiling melodies; dense walls of shoegaze

guitars pair with lighter-than-air synths; and heavy subject matter is delivered by siren

song vocals. Across their work, the listener gets a sense of empowerment at one turn,

vulnerability the next. As drummer Eliese Dorsay describes it, “some songs we’re the

predator, and some songs we’re the prey.” The juxtaposition of confidence and

uncertainty is never in as such stark relief as when one makes a life changing decision,

which may explain how the band’s relocation intensified their study in contrasts to

intoxicating new heights on Not Here Not Gone.

The title is the perfect description of the band’s adjustment. “It’s one foot in, one foot

out,” vocalist and guitarist/bassist Sunny Faris explains. “It’s about how you can lose

people in your life but still have their presence and energy around you.” And indeed,

listening to Not Here Not Gone, you get the distinct sense that Blackwater Holylight

dragged some of the Northwest gloom down into Southern California. The opening

chords of “How Will You Feel” are drenched in the muddy weight of perpetually overcast

skies. But a Jacob’s Ladder of light shines through the scuzzy guitars in the form of

Faris’ lilting vocals and Sarah McKenna’s blissed-out ambient synth work, guiding the

listener out of the mire and into the garden.

Even in their heaviest moments, like the sludgy psychedelia of “Bodies” and “Spades,”

Blackwater Holylight masterfully sculpt the thunder and grime into something that feels

transcendental. Lead single “Heavy, Why?” is perhaps the apex of the band’s masterful

duality and an appropriately titled examination of the ensemble’s methods. Mikayla

Mayhew’s low, dirge-like riff and Dorsay’s propulsive drums could easily find a home in

the catalog of an amp-worshipping Roadburn act, but Faris’ fragile vocals transform the

composition into a question, a pointed and probing examination that uses beauty and

grace to offset the threatening instrumentation.

In one of the biggest stylistic shifts of the album, the instrumental track “Giraffe” churns

out a hallucinatory blend of woozy keyboards and pulsating bass over a beat provided

by David Andrew Sitek (TV on the Radio, Run the Jewels, Solange). The song serves

as a dividing line of sorts, as Not Here Not Gone shifts gears into even more nuanced

territories. The band asserts that the primary change to their music has been the

addition of time. On previous albums, youthful urgency yielded material that felt

immediate and direct. But on Not Here Not Gone, Blackwater Holylight deliberately

slowed their creative pace. “If there were to be a theme to the album, it would be

patience,” says Faris. “Some of these songs we’ve been working on for three years, just

giving the songs time to breath and develop while we were exploring a new place and

new lives.” It’s especially evident on the latter half of the album, where tracks like “Void

to Be,” “Fade,” and “Mourning After” deliberately eschew the big riff in favor of fever

dream melodies and layered instrumentation. But forever savoring the paradox, the

album’s final track was composed just days before the band entered the studio.

“Poppyfields” is a harrowing account of a friend losing their home in an LA wildfire, set

against a backdrop of blast beats, double kick drum, symphonic synths, and black

metal-inspired guitars. In what feels like a counterweight to the album’s general tilt

towards less tormented territories, “Poppyfields” serves as a stark reminder that no

paradise is permanent, and everything will be reborn through ashes.

Not Here Not Gone was recorded at Sonic Ranch outside of El Paso TX by Sonny

Diperri (Narrow Head, DIIV, Emma Ruth Rundle), allowing the band to once again step

outside of their comfort zone and isolate themselves in a place where they could focus

exclusively on their art. The result is the crown jewel of Blackwater Holylight’s catalog—

a rich and immersive study in tonal chiaroscuro, where light finds its way out of the

shadows. Suicide Squeeze Records is proud to release Blackwater Holylight’s Not Here

Not Gone to the world on Limited Edition Deluxe LP, standard LP, and CD on January

30, 2026.

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