Anti Runners Run Club Launch Party

The Anti-Runners Run Club is having a party. Yes, there's running involved. We're sorry. It's short and slow, we promise.
Here's the play:
7:00 AM - Breakfast block party warm up. Show up, wake up, meet your fellow anti-runners.
7:30 AM - The run. An easy 2 miles at our signature "nobody gets dropped" pace. Walk it, jog it, complain through it. All valid.
After - Back to Spite Fitness for the real party, going until noon. DJs by Jay 2 The Sun. Local vendors. Free coffee from Central Coffee. Prizes all morning.
And the big one: a $300 gift card to Bliss Organic Day Spa. You run slow, you party, you might walk away with a spa day. That's the anti-runner lifestyle in one sentence.
Must be present to win. That's the rule. No exceptions, no proxies, no "can you hold it for me." Be there.
Limited edition launch merch drops at this event only. Small batch, event exclusive, gone when it's gone. This is the only place to get it.
All free. All fun. All paces, all bodies, all fitness levels. You don't have to be a runner. You just have to show up.
Bring a friend who hates running. That's how this whole thing started.